| Ulf Kleinings has been vouched for |
| VERIFIED MEMBER Identity Checked, Location Verified (3) more info |
| Couch available | Yes |
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| CouchSurf requests replied to | 100% |
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| member since | January 23rd, 2005 |
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| profile views | 74,235 |
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| age | 23 |
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| gender | Male |
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| membername | MRULF |
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| occupation | Gigolo and PC service nerd and occasionally video producer/editor AND this and that... |
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| education | HighSchoolLawSchool (now&then) since '94some general wisdom from life, traveling, women, reading, TV & movies! |
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| grew up in | Cologne |
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| ethnicity | Srawberry cream white chocolate covered Oreo |
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| Direct Profile URL |
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Languages- GermanExpert
- German (Austria)Intermediate
- German (Switzerland)Beginner
- English (United States)Expert
- English (United Kingdom)Expert
- English (Australia)Intermediate
- English (Canada)Expert
- English (Ireland)Intermediate
- English (Caribbean)Intermediate
- English (New Zealand)Expert
Couch Information
Couch Available: Yes
Preferred Gender: Any
Max Surfers Per Night: 6
Shared Sleeping Surface: Depends
Shared Room: DependsSee my general CouchDescription below (underneath the red box)!
I can NOT HOST ON THESE UPCOMING DATES:
JANUARY:
Fri., 27/01 - Mon, 20/01
FEBRUARY:
Fri., 03/02 - Mon, 06/02
Sat., 25/02 - Wed., 29/02
MARCH:
Thu., 01/03 - Mon., 05/03
Since June I've lived in a flat in Nippes, one of Cologne's nicests districts, just north of the city center: 2 km (= 30 walking minutes {= 2 metro-stops}) north of Dom /HBF (Cathedral & main station).
You will sleep either on my IKEA TROMSÖ queen size loft bed (for 2 people!) in my "guests'/living room" or on the sofa bed for 2 people underneath that!
Also there's space for 1 more on a mat on the floor as well as for 2-3 more on the floor in my room. AND ("if-need-be") for one more person with me in my own IKEA TROMSÖ queen size loft bed in my room - so 10 people max and thus 8-9 for CS guests!!!
So when I host several people then you might have to share a sleeping surface with a 2nd person - but they're all pretty spacious and comfortable (the sleeping surfaces - not the 2nd person, though they might be, too...);-) And I have a couple of blankets and all (so as long as I don't have more than 4-5 guests at a time you wouldn't necessarily have to bring your own stuff)!
ALSO MIND that I'll have to pass the "guests'/living room" to get from my room to the kitchen, bathroom and flat entrance (and vice versa)...
I can't give out keys and have to keep the (main) house door locked at night ...
The first because of an agreement with my landlord who's also a friend of mine (and the Dad of one of my Godsons), so I'm gonna stick to my word I gave him! The latter because the door doesn't close properly...
So the problem is that you'd have to wake me up in case you need to leave early to catch your flight or something (so I can let you out) - and that MIGHT be a problem when (e.g. on a working day or so) I cannot really get up too early since I cannot afford to be too tired that day...
Contact Method
VIA CouchSurfing!!!
BETTER NOT send me a "normal" Email (to ToUlf@web.de) since it happens very often that emails - especially from people whose email address my mail provider doesn't now (yet) - get stuck in my spam filter!
COUCHSURFING - mails ALWAYS get through, though, so if you "HAVE TO" send me a mail to ToUlf@web.de then always also send me a CS mail (or text me) to inform me that I have to get your "real" mail out of the "Unknown" or "Spam" folder!
or add me ( mrulk) SKYPE [but metion in your request, that this is about CS, or I might not approve this!]
Calling (or texting) me needs some more advice ;-) :
You can call or text me AT ANY TIME, 24/7 on: +49 - 179 - 109 1238
When I'm abroad I might not answer calls to save on roaming fees - but can receive texts for free and then reply to them online (though often not immediately then...)!
I'm one of the apparently very few people who know how to switch off the cell phone's ring-tone - and I actually do it all the time! So you can NEVER bother me - no matter what time you call!!!
When it is switched on then I almost always have my headset earphones in so that I can hardly miss a call ;-) Yet sometimes I might be somewhere where it's just too noisy to talk on the phone (party, Carnival, swinger club, Oktoberfest...) but with my voicebox usually switched off you can let it ring for quite some time. Do that to make sure I realize somebody is trying to call me!!! And then - when it's indeed too noisy to speak - we simply hang up and I'll wait for your text message to then continue to communicate this way!
Since I usually have my cell's voicemail switched off
you can leave me a voice message on this online voice box with a (cheaper!) German landline number:
+49 - 3212 - 2255853 .
But an SMS (text message) is always the better choice if you cannot get me on the phone to speak to me in person!!!
Again: +49 - 179 - 109 1238
Friends (685)
 CouchSurfing Media
110, Several people
Amundsen-Scott Station, Antarctica
Antarctica
Friends since August 2009
"CS PR and Media Team"
Friendship Type: Best Friend
  30+  30+  30+ |
 Josh Cahill
25, Male
Berlin, Berlin
Germany
Friends since October 2008
"ulfs henchman... :D"
Friendship Type: Close Friend
I vouched for Ulf Kleinings
1 30+ 20 |
 Gregor Kleiber
22, Male
Cologne, North Rhine-Westphalia
Germany
Friends since August 1996
"He was the.... MAJOR :D"
Friendship Type: Good Friend
|
 Christopher Groth
32, Male
Munich, Bavaria
Germany
Friends since September 1999
"I met Ulf in San Diego/USA, in a meeting when he was planning a trip to Mazatlan/Mexico for several students."
Friendship Type: Close Friend
|
 LAULAW.
26, Female
Berlin, Berlin
Germany
Friends since 1999
"i met ulf in 1999 on a student campus in san diego, ca. had a wonderful time there and enjoyed to explore california and mexico with ulf and other funny people i met there."
|
 Raffaella Bona
31, Female
Novi Ligure, Piemonte
Italy
Friends since July 2009
"through lots of Sambuca shots, fingers on fire and a very good tiramisu I must say"
Friendship Type: Friend
|
 Maïlys Amrous
21, Female
Montrouge, Ile-de-France
France
Friends since September 2009
"I payed him a compliment about his panties during paella 09, he wrote me (enjoyable) 2346inches long mails"
Friendship Type: Good Friend
I vouched for Ulf Kleinings
30+ 30+ 30+ |
 Susanne Fleig
30, Female
Elmshorn, Schleswig-Holstein
Germany
Friends since September 1999
"9 Month of Campus Life in San Diego. He made it special! ;)"
Friendship Type: Friend
30+ |
 Eric Veium
30, Male
San Luis Obispo, California
United States
Friends since February 2006
"Where do I begin!! Ulf and I have done it all together: Karnval Twice, Fruhlingsfest, Berlin Beach Party, Hitchiking in Austria. Ulf is my favorite Couchsurfer in the whole world!!"
Friendship Type: Close Friend
2 14 7 |
 Jelena Hrvojevic
30, Female
Split, Split-Dalmatia
Croatia
Friends since June 2009
"Vienna calling 2009"
Friendship Type: Friend
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Personal DescriptionI'm
us Kölle
Oh so European,
a little bit impatient,
definitely extremely liberal,
at quite some times quite funny,
really very scarily hairy here and there,
(even still!) a tiny little bit overweight on certain parts
Hardly ever boring but sometimes perhaps a tad irritating…
AND
To some I may come across pretty offensive sometimes - see below!
(but I swear: I usually do NOT mean it:
PLEASE read my GENERAL DISCLAIMER
before bashing me publicly or reporting me to anybody!
AND WATCH THIS John Cleese Interview on PoliticalCorrectness and Sensitives sickening Societies...!!!)
 Free counters
NOW YOU SEE ALL THOSE WONDERFUL REFERENCES ABOUT ME BELOW
and so you might think:
"He can't be that God-like - surely he must have paid all those guys!"???
Well - it MIGHT be quite enlightening
but WILL SURELY BE very entertaining for you to
READ SOME VERY DIFFERENT IDEAS ABOUT ME!!!
01) In order to give all a fair chance, to collect some opinions about me, that are clearly not very positive, I had here for months a list with names and profile links of a couple of CouchSurfers (whom I fondly called 'my dear friends from CS's funny-farm - the notorious "Brainstorm"-group(s)'), who did (and mostly still do) repeatedly express their dislike/disdain/loathing for me in posts in CS groups like that very Brainstorm group.
THEN I got anonymously reported for that to CS's own MDST (Member Dispute and Safety Team), and instead of insisting on their very own directives ('We ask that members first try to work out their differences between themselves in a clear, calm, and polite manner, either in person, or over the phone or email'), the MDST guys once again honored such ratting behavior (thus long-term strengthening a culture of mutual denunciations among CS'ers - rather than the alleged concept of your responsibility for yourself, and [...] self-moderating community [...]), by letting the rats have it their way when on their behalf exercising their MDST-power over me, by ordering me to take off the names and ask these guys' permission first!
The MDST DID, however, allow me to put (Perma)links to posts in here, in which those guys speak about me. Even the fact, that from there it's just one more click to the poster's profile, didn't make the MDST re-consider their prohibition to put these profile links here directly!?!
So here we go: (list of Permalinks -sorted by their authors - coming soon!)
TO TOP THAT MADNESS, one of the guys, whose names I had to take out of here, copied and pasted the entire bit, that I had to change (INCLUDING THESE NAMES!) in a public post RIGHT HERE:-D
02) Learn what an actual CS friend of mine (compared to whom even I would never be considered offensive really:-D) believes to know
about my sex life!
03) Check out this awesome thread
(referring to this picture, brought up by fellow CS'er GmU in this silly thread from my own pics side from here on...)!
{You gotta ask me about the real story behind that pic when we meet!}
Granted: that one comes straight from those lovely "different" minds of our good friends from CS's very own wanna-be watch-group,
but it's still hilarious in its own (totally unintended!) way:
04) Like, for example, also those very nice and exemplary OCS posts about - Hey! - me and my dick, apparently;-D) -
including an actual "HEIL ULF !!" 'joke'!!!
There are also some really lovely specimen of steeped in friendliness CS'ers in some of Europe's capitals, like
05) Berlin, about me working with German commercial network RTL
for this report on one of their most successful ("boulevard magazine") show ''RTL EXPLOSIV WEEKEND" (German with {SELF-MADE!} English subtitles)
- first in this (German only, unfortunately) thread of November 2007
as well as this second one going on at the same time!
- and then again in another thread started ALMOST 2 YEARS LATER
by Laura from Berlin-Potsdam but in the Cologne city group (and at least at last in English even...) who actually was on my CS friend list for more than 2 years before I took her off after she'd insinuated in this post that I was co-responsible for an actual rape by taking part in that report...
06) Berlin, again, about a media report about CS again, all in German again - but containing this pearl with Uwe picking apart my whole profile in an outstandingly inept and pitiful attempt to offend me personally:-D
07) Some very fine examples of highest style of posting by 'Fraser' and 'Puuraja' ([CTRL]/[STRG] + [F] search the page for those 2 names after opening that mega-long thread!!!) in
THE OUTSTANDING COLOGNE ORGY THREAD...
08) One of my all-time favorites:
the Ulf bashing thread of July 2009 in the London city group,
containing Ash Bongster's unsurpassable epitome of ''Jerry Springer''-like gutter style in posting
X-P
How I Participate in CS CUQ (thru...)
(...) Media Response Team
Event Message Approval Team
AND I AM ONE OF THE CS COURT JESTERS - BUT NOT "JUST A CLOWN"!!!
I treasure humor as a great way to interact with other humans
(see: CNN's Lou Dobbs' Gut Check on straight talk & honesty in comedy)
and I happen to like my sense of humor!!!
YOU DON'T HAVE TO LIKE IT, too, but AT LEAST TRY TO HONOR
WHAT CS IS (also) ABOUT by letting all kinds of ideologies coexist!!!
Now it feels to me that there are
- too many on CS who get offended by every little bullshit,
- too many who don't bother (or are simply unable?) to think for a second whether or not s.th. was meant to insult anyone - or perhaps just (for example) to be funny,
- too many of us who seem to try to gain (self) respect (or whatever) from showing public indignation about others' opinions or actions and
- too many who believe to serve the community best by constantly helping the first three group of CS'ers listed above and protecting them from criticism and I fear that this way they only encourage and enable them to go on being this way...
(Ulf has been thinking #4: The Coarse, the Dolt and the Over-Aiders...)
And since especially that latter group of "helpful" CS'ers seems (or at least clearly used) to be the vast majority on all the main CS groups I kind of made it my task to raise a different voice on CS, state a different view here and there and argue for more than just one way to do things for CS, to argue in groups, to communicate with members and so on and thus to actually take the CS mission and vision serious and fight for variety and tolerating the coexistence of more than one culture (including different cultures of communication or different styles of humor...)!
CouchSurfing Experience
Thanks first to my yearlong stay on the USIU campus in San Diego, CA, and then, of course, to CS I now have friends everywhere, use these connections a lot to get around and am always glad having these guys as my guests in Cologne
Interests
Sauna
Movies,
Musicals ,
Politics & History ,
Having a Kölsch or two (or three…) or -if need be- some other kind of beer with friends,
Traveling to other places, meeting foreigners and learning about customs, opinions and ways of life which are different to mine
and
Law
Philosophy
Music, Movies, Books
Movies:
almost everything by SPIELBERG
[especially "E.T." & "Schindler's List" ]
almost everything by CHAPLIN
[especially "The Kid" & "The Great Dictator" ]
almost everything by F.F.COPPOLA
[especially>"The Godfather I , II and (YES!!!) III " & "The Outsiders" ]
almost everything by MONTY PYTHON
[especially "Life of Brian" & the 2 German Episodes, especially the first withNO dubs but the Pythons speaking German! of "Flying Circus" ],
almost everything by DISNEY
[especially "The Lion King" & "The Jungle Book" ]
and almost everything by HITCHCOCK
[especially "Psycho" and "The Trouble With Harry" ]
AND
"Good Will Hunting" , "Dead Poets Society" , "The Never Ending Story" , "Threesome" , "Star Wars" (and I hereby declare George Lucas a big-time asshole for being too vain to let some other director{s} do Episodes VII-IX when he feels too old to do them himself!!!), "Stand by Me" , "Gladiator" , "Cider House Rules" , "The Usual Suspects" , "Murder on the Orient Express" , "The Name of the Rose" , "Ocean's Eleven" (& "~ Twelve" ), "One, Two, Three" , "Full Monty" , "Saving Grace" , "All about my mother" , "Au revoir, les enfants" , "Ice Age" , "Shrek" , "Once upon a time in The West" (& " ~ in America" ), "Lola rennt" , "Goodbye Lenin" , "Sleepers" , "La Boum" (and more: "La Boum 2") ...
TV:
"Gilmore Girls" , "Sex and the City" , "The Simpsons" , "South Park" , "Mr. Bean" , "Nip/Tuck" , "Desperate Housewives" , "North And South" , "Picket Fences" , "Ally McBeal" , "E.R." , "Cinderella '87" , "Band of Brothers" , "Kir Royal" , "Stromberg" (Germany's "The Office" – even better than the U.K.'s original!!!) , "Falcon Crest" ,
and
"ALF" and "Twin Peaks"
AND
ABSOLUTELY EVERYTHING by Heinrich Breloer !!!
Music:
Soundtracks,
especially (almost) EVERYTHING by John Williams ,
Musicals ,
especially Andrew Lloyd Webber & Claude-Michel Schönberg ,
Oldies,
especially (almost) EVERYTHING by The Beatles but also ABBA , The Beach Boys , ..............
Kölsche Hits,
especially (almost) EVERYTHING by De Bläck Fööss and De Höhner ...,
AND MANY MORE...
Books:
"Les Miserables" , "The Beach" , "The Wave" , Michael Moore's Books , Grisham's Books , Harry Potter (totally addicted!!!), Krabat ("The Satanic Mill") , "The Pillars of the Earth" , "Treasure Island" , "The Neverending Story"
AND BIOGRAPHIES,
especially 3 very good ones about Chaplin , Evita and Hitler !
[NOT L.o.t.R. – for me reading that crap was the MOST BORING waste of time ever – the only example I'd know of where the movies are worlds apart (better!) from the books!!!]
Types of People I enjoyOPEN-MINDED PEOPLE - BUT:
It's not enough to slap some "open minded" on your profile - EVERYBODY DOES THAT...
You think you really are open-minded? Meet me - I'll try you!!!
Apart from that I like funny people who are interested in a large variety [and have at least some knowledge] of all kinds of different things. And who share as many of my interest as possible but as little of my opinions as possible - so we can have interesting, juicy and long talks and discussions (with a few Kölsch {when you come to Cologne} or some other "social drink") ;-)Teach, Learn, Share.
Thru my activities on CS I've met an alarming high number of people who are obviously unable to spot irony or sarcasm when it's in front of their eyes let alone to handle it properly!
(I don't even wanna imagine how they surely must suck at any attempt to use any themselves...)
So I decided to give anyone a helping hand on IRONY and SARCASM who might need it!
Just meet me online or face to face!
Sauna
Fasting
Cologne (and OUR (!) Carnival !)
Digital Video Editing
traveling on a shoe-string in Europe using low-cost airlines and online train offers etc. One Amazing Thing I've Seen or Done
Lot's of little things with all the kids who so much enriched my life: my group kids (during my many years as a leader with a Catholic youth group), all my babysitter kids I took care of in the last 15 years including my Godson Jakob - and especially since May 2003 my nephew and Godson Peter and since October 2006 my new nephew Paul!
Some unusual sex experiences
Paragliding above the Gulf of California at the beach right in front of our beautifully located hotel in Mazatlan AND tandem parachute jump during sunset on Oahu, Hawaii
For a night at a gay sauna in Berlin being the "guinea pig" for a gay friend of mine, who wanted to proof to me that (t)his Freudian theory is true, according to which I (just like every straight guy) by nature would be "a bit" gay, too ;-)
Opinion on the CouchSurfing.org ProjectAfter all my always very good experiences so far I'm now totally convinced that this thing cannot be misused by assholes - thanks to all these ingenious features like the verification thing, the references and the interconnection between everybody through the friends list and the "How Do I Know..."-feature and so on!!! I truly believe that a thing like this will mainly or perhaps almost only be used by really interesting and cool people who are always up for meeting people. I hope to have enough time and opportunity to host people at my place as often as possible and can use CouchSurfing for my own trips sometimes, too.Locations TraveledTRAVELED: Austria, Belgium, Canada, Croatia, Czech Republic, Denmark, England, Finland, France, Ireland (Republic of), Italy, Liechtenstein, Luxembourg, Mexico, Monaco, Netherlands, Poland, Portugal, San Marino, Spain, Switzerland, The Bahamas, Turkey, Vatican
LIVED: Bodies of water, Christmas Island, Europa Island, United States
What do these numbers mean?
This summary is not a replacement for reading references; it's a quick summary to help you get started. At a glance, you can see how many references a member has, and how many of them are positive, neutral, and negative.
In the second line, you'll see how many references came from people who hosted this member, surfed with them, and traveled with them. These numbers won't always add up to the total: some references are not categorized, and some may be categorized as more than one thing.
When viewing this summary, don't jump to conclusions! Things that are negative for one person may be positive for another, and vice versa. It's important to read references carefully and evaluate what that information means to you. References (432)412Positive 16Neutral 4Negative
45From Hosts 180From Surfers 80Traveling
 From Alphan Yılmaz Ankara, Turkey
Jan 29 Positive Based on his profile, I was expecting someone different. Ulf is a highly experienced CS'er. Have no worries staying with him. I wish we had more time to talk, there are still questions that I couldn't shoot.
And I think Ulf will come to my mind whenever I try to avoid offending someone.
 From Eva Catharina Saxebøl Berlin, Germany
Jan 23 Positive Oh the Ulfster!
Ive heard much about this bastard, met him here and there, and hosted him for a couple of nights in December and I guess its time I left him a reference. Always full of polite criticism, muzzling on his wheat beer, its been nice to run into him at my flat or at CS parties.
I hope I get to host you again at some point. Ill make sure to "take care" of my parents beforehand.
 From Carlo Vogels Eindhoven, Netherlands
Jan 16 Positive Together with Svetlana, Joost, Mohsin and Praveen we joined Ulf, Josh and Candice in Köln, where we hooked in on the German traditions from 'Die Feuerzangenbowle' while watching to the German 1944-movie with the same title,
carefully subtitled in English by Mr. Ulf himself.
On Saturday we joined the XmasMarket Crawl which he annually organizes. In the evening we ended up with a bunch of CSers in 'Früh's Brauhaus am Dom'.
Sunday we had a CS-Xmas Brunch at Alex on Friesenstraße.
Before I met Ulf I regularly read his opinions in the Ambassador forum, saw his remarkable profile and personal description.
Ulf is at least somebody who uses his brains and has developed an opinion, although I maybe do not necessary share it, it gives at least a lot of stuff and arguments to think about.
Anyway Ulf is an interesting guy to hang around with, see you maybe next time in Phantasialand.
 From Mohsin Iqbal Eindhoven, Netherlands
Jan 5 Positive I enjoyed his generous hosting for two night for Xmass market in Cologne. He and his room Josh made that trip so fun that i want to go back to their city for more good time...Perhaps see you guys in Carnival...this Feb.
 From Juan Carlos dl G Cologne, Germany
Dec 26, 2011 Positive Great guy who helped me a lot and spent a great time with!!
Really good organizer and guide!!
Definately want to stay in touch with him!!!
 From Joost van Lierop Eindhoven, Netherlands
Dec 22, 2011 Positive Ulf is a cool guy that showed me a lot of german culture and history. Besides that he is a very good host. Ulf can talk about any subject you want, you will not get bored. Thanks Ulf for the perfect weekend you organized!
 From Ðã♥ìɖ ☯ ℱЯ犬ÑÇع ☺ Ωびगםö Kyiv, Ukraine
Nov 27, 2011 Positive U_nique he obviously & definitely is
L_ong(gggggggg) are his posts, so much that at some point he had created his own group to post the longest ones
F_ixed he is on his ideas, make him change his mind might be evaluated as a "Mission: Impossible"
K_öln he is a symbol of, in the CS world, as much as the Cathedral (probably even more)
L_iberal he is, the freedom of speech & action are prominent
E_vents he loves to join... I actually first met him at one of those, Vienna Calling 2011
I_rritating he can be to many, but he doesn't mind
N_asty he can be with you if he doesn't like you, but as there's a fine line between hate & love, who knows where it might lead
I_nvited I was to join him in his activity... convinced he tried to make me, but forced I never was
N_ice he is after all, if you meet him you will realize he's gentle as a lamb
G_enerous he is, especially when it comes to share his time & space (hosting so many people)
S_aunas he's truly fond of
...
ULF KLEININGS!
Danke!!! ツ
 From Anni Dwuzet Sylt, Germany
Nov 18, 2011 Positive we met for the carneval i met a lot of nice people through ulf and we celebrated the carneval but then i was to drunk ^^ and felt asleep ^^ but nice to meet you see u again some day
 From Candice Turner Cape Town, South Africa
Nov 9, 2011 Positive Intelligent, bright, brilliant, knowing, quick-witted, smart, intellectual. Ulf is someone you are guaranteed to have a stimulating conversation/debate with. He has a plethora of experiences to share...with a wealth of knowledge to offer, if you're open to receiving it. He is also incredibly funny and mirthful and I highly recommend spending as much time as you can with him.
"Experience is one thing you can't get for nothing." - Oscar Wilde
 From Valeri Sherni Albuquerque, United States
Nov 8, 2011  Negative My "personal impression" of Ulf comes only from forum interactions in which we disagreed, for which he calls me hysterical, etc.; and in my rejecting his private request (he was forced to that by MDST) to link to my profile solely to demean me.
My experience has been that not accepting 'Ulf is always right' results in his attacking people personally on groups all over the world (I have seen this dozens of times)- which i regard as bullying and consider inappropriate and damaging to CS. As a mental health professional I also find this worrying! If you would like a good example of 'projection' of one's own personality issues onto others, the second paragraph of his reference to me is a good example:). IMO, such people are not to be taken seriously as they are so desperate for attention.
Happy to share more;).. but no space for this/other relevance, except that I left his negative up for a year only astonished at him and MDST refusing to remove a 'vengeance for group posts' ref.
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188 
Cologne
Buenos Aires
London
Berlin
