Girl! you've come to the right group! I usually take out my guests to Gay bars and they always have a blast, even when they are straight. Tuesdays are $1 drinks at the Edge and you can head to nearby Badlands afterwards or Karaoke Tuesdays at Toad Hall, all in the Castro. Wednesdays are "Lesbian lipstick nights" at Q Bar, and thursdays at Toad Hall seem to be popular with Lesbians as well. As for gay men, there is something every night of the week. I would suggest going to a gay circuit party is you want a massive party, theres usually one every two weeks.
I'm coming too. With two friends, we're gonna spend all summer in SF. We're coming from Croatia, Europe. Hope we're gonna party together, it would be cool!